With so much going on last year, and my lack of
The short version goes a little something like this...
The summer before Kindergarten we enrolled the kiddos in a neighborhood school "readiness" program. All four excelled and flew through with flying colors and praise. The teachers even tried to talk us into skipping Kindergarten and moving all four on to 1st grade. They had just turned 5.
One month later they began Kindergarten at a private, Catholic institution, my Alma mater! They even had my 1st grade teacher, who I adore(d)! How sweet, right?! We were so excited and I knew, leaving my babies, they were in amazing hands.
Well, turns out, our "readiness" teachers didn't quiet have it right. Within the first couple of months, all four kiddos began to struggle socially, emotionally, and academically. I won't bore you with all the details and stories, but I will try and summarize. First, they were REALLY young for their class (in most cases nearly a year younger). Next, having all 4 in the class became a detriment to their development. Libby, who is incredibly shy, would hang on Molly and Ally all day long. They were treating her like a baby, and this mama was NOT HAVING THAT! Then, Mr. Russell started to have some behavioral issues. The little dude was just NOT ready to sit still and focus... the kid, just like his mommy, is like the dog in UP, "Squirrel!" The new schedules, drop-off routine, pre-class time, post-class time - it all added up and was hard for him to handle and maintain his attention span and focus.
At this point, we sat down and talked about moving Russ and Libby down to TK and keeping Molly and Ally in Kindergarten. The thought of separating them a grade level broke my heart, but I knew we needed to decide what was best for each child. First and foremost, they are individuals. Mrs. Williams (their teacher) was kind and patient with us and we weighed the pros and cons over the next few weeks. Lord knows she has had practice in this matter... SHE is the one who HELD ME BACK in 1st grade and I was so much because off because of it. Anyway, just when we were ready to move Libs and Russ... Molly and Ally started to struggle as well.
The rest of the class was starting to read and they could not keep up. We worked on site words tirelessly at home, but it just wasn't translating in the classroom. Before we knew it, they were having behavioral and social issues too - a result of frustration. They just weren't ready for the seriousness and structure of the Kindergarten classroom. When did Kindergarten become 1st grade?
In many ways, our BIG KIDS just needed a bit more time as little kids. They didn't attend a formal Pre-K program, and much of my efforts to work on curriculum at home went well. But sometimes you can't replicate experiences, socialization, and time to acclimate to new environments and experiences outside the house. Translation? All four needed to move down to TK. In a way, it was a positive that we waited so long to move Russ and Libby, because moving all 4 did make the transition a bit less traumatic. Within a week our kiddos began to thrive again and we knew, without a doubt, that we had made the right decision for each of them.
Throughout the rest of the year each child made his/her mark on the class and were free to share their talents and accomplishments in a more laid back environment. They gravitated towards different kids, made other friends and prided themselves on what made each of them special, distinct. However, we knew, in private school (one class per grade level), they were not going to get the separation they truly needed. The faculty, though sad to lose us, agreed that we needed to do what was best for our kids. Fast forward to...
This Spring we moved up to an area with truly WONDERFUL public schools. Schools were not the only reason for our move, but that is another story for a different time! Today we watched with giant grins as the fruits of that labor and difficult decisions paid off. Today, we sent them off, smiling ear to ear, to their new school. It feels so different from last year. Today they were confident and ready to CONQUER Kindergarten.
In their new school, they will be separated 2/2 and not looked at as a group (at least not all the time =), but as the darling individual people that they are. Eventually, if they want, they can even be in 4 classrooms. How cool is that?! So, how did we decided on who goes where? Easy! Russ and Molly share a room. Ally and Libby share a room. At school Russ and Libby are classmates as are Molly and Ally.
So far, this dynamic works great for each child. Molly and Ally are fiercely independent and social YET different as night and day. They will do well together. Russ, goofy and super outgoing ("Hi, I'm Russell. Want to be my friend?"), marches to the beat of his own drum, but I know he will keep an eye on his sweet sister. Libby, shy as the night is long, won't have her sisters to cling to and I hope that this will give her a chance to blossom and make friends on her own (something she had a hard time doing last year).
Happy First Day!
(L to R)
Ally, Molly, Russ, Libby
Classmates
Russ and Libby
Classmates
Molly (bed head) & Ally
I am thrilled to report that upon pick up this afternoon they were all in great spirits and could not wait to share the days activities. It's going to be a GREAT year for the McNulty kiddos. :)
Perfectly disheveled!
(L to R)
Molly (mile long legs like daddy), Libby, Russ & Ally
xoxo
Gen





Big hugs, it sounds like you made all the right decisions. We only have twins, but we are separating them next week in K and I know it's time.
ReplyDeleteI bet the kids are going to have a great year!
The parenting gig may be difficult, but you're stellar at it! The best thing you can do is be open with your child's education. Clearly you are!!!! They're adorable little munchkins. Hope the rest of the school year goes well, I'm sure it will.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, their first day pictures are adorable. :)
ReplyDeleteWhen my daughter (just turned 8 and soon to be second grader)was finising up PreK, I wrestled night after night about whether or not to send her to kindergarten that year as a just-turned 5 year old, or wait until the next year and have her be one of the older kids. Ugh, I can only imagine that feeling times four!
Ultimately, we decided to wait and I'm so happy we did! I think she would have been OK either way academically, but socially, it has definitely been the right decision. She is a leader, not only in her classroom, but across the entire grade. On the other hand, she plays up in soccer and is always the youngest, sometimes by two years. While she plays hard and listens well, she is very quiet and definitely a follower with the other girls.
Best of luck this year! I enjoy reading your blog.
Kellie
I am so glad you were able to make adjustments last year that were good for everyone and helped get them all ready for this year. We were in a similar boat last year. J&S COULD have started regular Kdg last year but their birthday fell just 4 days before the cut off. We were encouraged to start them but we wanted to give them another year, especially since J had had some motor delays. We felt he needed the year for motor and academic growth while his sister needed some time for emotional growth.
ReplyDeleteSo we had to push for it but we were able to give them a year of Developmental Kdg and I'm so glad we did. their Kdg screening scores both showed a good amount of improvement and i know they'll be ready for regular Kdg this year and more in the middle of the pack, age wise instead of the absolute youngest.
I'm so glad your kiddos were off to a great start this year and I hope its a great year all around!
Soo cute!
ReplyDeleteWOW! I coudln't stop reading. Schooling decisions for multiples are so hard, I'm glad you found something that works for you. My twins are just about to turn 2 but I already split them up into 2 separate classes in daycare for a range of reasons
ReplyDeleteI just found your blog, you are a amazing family, Your kids are so cute!!!! Thanks for sharing your story!
ReplyDeleteBoth my daughters have September birthdays. I struggled with sending them to kindergarten when they would be just turning 5 years old. In Michigan we have Young 5s for the year before kindergarten. My daughters were ready academically, but we worried more about them socially once they hit junior high and high school. We decided to do Young 5s for both girls. A friend told me "you will never regret getting them an extra year of school, but you will regret sending them too early". My oldest is a 5th grader and I can tell the kids that are a full year younger than her--what a difference in maturity. You made the right call! Parenting decisions are tough.
ReplyDeleteGen, you have no idea how happy I was to see that your wrote about this subject. Not because I am happy that the little ones had a harder time last year, but because you were brave enough to write..to tell the world that you know what, some kids are simply not ready and need more time. Especially multiples...and preemies...
ReplyDeleteMy twin boys will be 4 tomorrow. They were borna week before the school cut-off, Sept 1. So we started them in prek-3 last year. They were clearly the youngest...they are in pre-k4 this year and clearly the youngest and smallest (my boys are Russ' size). Most kids are well into 4s and some are turning 5 as we speak.
Our plan, and I already know this, is to have them repeat prek-4 at this private school. I am not sending them onto kindergarten because of emotional maturity. I see a big difference between them and the other kids in class (we still look in-between a toddler and little kids, the others are way into being little kids).
I wish your little ones the best and please keep us posted. I missed all the frequent updates on your blog. But I understand..I am, too, returning to full-time work next week and life is different for sure!
Esther